{"id":100207,"date":"2023-03-06T03:10:40","date_gmt":"2023-03-06T08:10:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/qa.tergar.org\/lms-dev\/?post_type=blog&p=100207"},"modified":"2023-03-30T12:34:06","modified_gmt":"2023-03-30T17:34:06","slug":"how-to-improve-self-esteem","status":"publish","type":"blog","link":"https:\/\/qa.tergar.org\/lms-dev\/blog\/meditation-in-everyday-life\/how-to-improve-self-esteem\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Improve Self-Esteem"},"content":{"rendered":"

[vc_row u_row_style=”1″ lms_row_has_bk_offset=”0″ lms_row_bk_columns_offset=”0″ u_row_enrollment_restriction=”0″][vc_column width=”1\/12″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-2 vc_hidden-xs”][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”5\/6″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-8″ el_class=”head-post”][vc_column_text]<\/p>\n

Self-Esteem Meditation, How to Improve Self-Esteem<\/strong><\/h1>\n

By Tergar Staff \u2022 8 min read[\/vc_column_text][vc_column_text el_class=”sharepost”]\n\t\t\t\t

SHARE:\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/i><\/a>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/i><\/a>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/i><\/a>\n\t<\/p>[\/vc_column_text][vc_btn title=”TRY FOR FREE” style=”outline” color=”peacoc” align=”left” el_class=”btn-post” link=”url:https%3A%2F%2Fjoy.tergar.org%2Fjoy-of-living%2F||target:%20_blank|”][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”1\/12″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-2 vc_hidden-xs”][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row u_row_style=”1″ lms_row_has_bk_offset=”0″ lms_row_bk_columns_offset=”0″ u_row_enrollment_restriction=”0″][vc_column width=”1\/12″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-2 vc_hidden-xs”][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”5\/6″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-8″][vc_column_text el_class=”subtittle-open-post”]<\/p>\n

Self-Esteem is Key<\/b><\/h3>\n

It\u2019s really important to have self-esteem \u2014 we hear that a lot, and we might believe it, but that doesn\u2019t mean it\u2019s easy to do. Sometimes when we try to believe in ourselves, dark clouds of doubt or even self-loathing gather. Sure, it\u2019s possible to fake confidence, but what is the trick to building genuine self-esteem?<\/p>\n

Right now, right here, your true nature is wonderful, pure, and perfect. This is true regardless of what kind of person you are, what social class or categories you might fit into, what gender or race you identify with, where on the map you come from, or what your past history consists of.<\/p>\n

But merely being told that this is the case is not enough, of course. To build self-esteem, you need to know what the good qualities within you actually are. And there are so many of them! To start with, you have wisdom, love, and compassion. You have knowledge, skills, and powers. Some of these capabilities you\u2019re aware of, some of these you take for granted, and some you\u2019re not conscious of. In all probability, you don\u2019t have a realistic sense of how truly capable you are.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”1\/12″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-2 vc_hidden-xs”][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row u_row_style=”1″ lms_row_has_bk_offset=”1″ lms_row_bk_columns_offset=”0″ u_row_enrollment_restriction=”0″][vc_column lms_has_clearfix=”0″][vc_single_image image=”100251″ img_size=”full” alignment=”center” css=”.vc_custom_1644606046611{padding-top: 30px !important;padding-bottom: 30px !important;}” el_class=”hidden-xs”][vc_single_image image=”100250″ img_size=”full” alignment=”center” css=”.vc_custom_1644606060931{padding-top: 30px !important;padding-bottom: 30px !important;}” el_class=”visible-xs”][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row u_row_style=”1″ lms_row_has_bk_offset=”0″ lms_row_bk_columns_offset=”0″ u_row_enrollment_restriction=”0″][vc_column width=”1\/12″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-2 vc_hidden-xs”][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”5\/6″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-8″][vc_column_text el_class=”subtittle-open-post”]<\/p>\n

Why is it Hard to See Our Good Qualities?<\/b><\/h3>\n

Our fundamental nature is good, yes. But most of the time, we are tossed on waves of desire<\/a>, craving, anger, pride, ignorance, and jealousy. \u201cI\u2019ve got to get a better apartment. I\u2019m desperate for cash. My boss doesn\u2019t see that I do his job better than he does. I have no idea how to fix this relationship. My best friend always has someone, and I\u2019m still single \u2014 it\u2019s not fair!\u201d<\/p>\n

In Buddhism, these powerful emotions are referred to as \u201cthe five defilements\u201d or \u201cthe five poisons.\u201d They influence our behavior, creating untold suffering: problems in our relationships, depression, panic, lack of self-love, physical disease, and problems for the environment, too.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”1\/12″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-2 vc_hidden-xs”][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row u_row_style=”1″ lms_row_has_bk_offset=”0″ lms_row_bk_columns_offset=”0″ u_row_enrollment_restriction=”0″][vc_column width=”1\/12″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-2 vc_hidden-xs”][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”5\/6″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-8″][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1646235294034{padding-top: 20px !important;padding-bottom: 40px !important;}” el_class=”subtittle-open-post”]<\/p>\n

Doesn\u2019t that Just Prove I\u2019m Bad?<\/b><\/h3>\n

Nope! Not at all. It just proves that we\u2019re only familiar with these poisons. Our minds grab these five defilements and stick with them. That\u2019s because we don’t know how to access the deeper, more profound levels of our consciousness. Your mind is like a lake of pristine water. There are ripples and waves on the surface<\/a>, but beneath that, the water remains pure. The real quality of mind is pure and pristine: it has awareness, genuine love, and compassion. The poisons, the negative emotions, exist only on the surface. This is the Buddhist way to view your true nature: seeing wisdom within the defilements.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”1\/12″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-2 vc_hidden-xs”][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row u_row_style=”1″ lms_row_has_bk_offset=”1″ lms_row_bk_columns_offset=”0″ u_row_enrollment_restriction=”0″ lms_row_bk_offset_section_classes=”bk-qoute-full”][vc_column][vc_column_text]\u201cYou are not the limited person you think you are. Any trained Buddhist teacher can tell you with all the conviction of personal experience that, really, you\u2019re the very heart of compassion, completely aware, and fully capable of achieving the greatest good, not only for yourself, but for everyone and everything that you can imagine.\u201d[\/vc_column_text][vc_column_text el_class=”autorquotepost”]\u2013 Mingyur Rinpoche \u2013[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row u_row_style=”1″ lms_row_has_bk_offset=”0″ lms_row_bk_columns_offset=”0″ u_row_enrollment_restriction=”0″][vc_column width=”1\/12″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-2 vc_hidden-xs”][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”5\/6″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-8″][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1646235434554{padding-top: 20px !important;padding-bottom: 20px !important;}” el_class=”subtittle-open-post”]<\/p>\n

Meditation to Connect with Your Wisdom<\/b><\/h3>\n

Here is one meditation technique to go through defilements and out to the other side:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Take a meditation position<\/a>: keep your spine loosely straight, and let your body relax. If you find that you can\u2019t relax, just allow that to be true \u2014 that in itself is to be relaxed! You can gently close your eyes, or leave them slightly open, whichever feels most comfortable.<\/li>\n
  2. Ask yourself, from deep within your heart, \u201cWhat do I really want?\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    The answer you get first may be from the surface level, from desire \u2014 for example, \u201cI want enough money to feel secure; I want a wonderful partner who understands me; I want to get up and make lunch.\u201d<\/p>\n

      \n
    1. Go deeper. Ask yourself, \u201cLet\u2019s say that I get all these things I want. What would I want then?\u201d You will find there are many layers to the answer. Let go of the surface answer and go deeper and deeper. Keep asking until you find something meaningful. Each person will discover something a little bit different. Some will touch on the wisdom of love, the wisdom of compassion, the wisdom of impermanence, or nonconceptual wisdom. It might be something entirely different. Maybe you cannot even put a name to it \u2013 you sense that it\u2019s your true feeling, but maybe it\u2019s impossible to put it into words. That\u2019s okay.<\/li>\n
    2. Whatever you find has arisen after asking this question and trying to connect with your deep wisdom, let it be. Don\u2019t fix your mind on it. Appreciate it and rest your mind in that state of awareness.<\/li>\n
    3. To end the session, open your eyes and just rest for a few moments. Take in the environment around you, the sights and sounds. If you like you can rotate your shoulders, or wiggle your fingers and toes.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

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      By Tergar Meditation Community Team<\/a><\/h3>\n

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Grounded in the Tibetan Buddhist lineage of our guiding teacher, Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche, our online and in-person programs are accessible to people of all cultures and faiths, and support a lifelong path toward the application of these principles in everyday life.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”1\/12″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_col-lg-2 vc_hidden-xs”][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row u_row_style=”1″ lms_row_has_bk_offset=”0″ lms_row_bk_columns_offset=”0″ u_row_enrollment_restriction=”0″][vc_column width=”1\/12″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_hidden-xs”][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”10\/12″][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”1\/12″ lms_has_clearfix=”0″ offset=”vc_hidden-xs”][\/vc_column][\/vc_row]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"It\u2019s really important to have confidence \u2014 we hear that a lot, and we might believe it, but that doesn\u2019t mean it\u2019s easy to do. Sometimes when we try to believe in ourselves, dark clouds of doubt or even self-loathing gather. Sure, it\u2019s possible to fake confidence, but what is…","protected":false},"featured_media":100250,"template":"","tags":[135,177,158,176,175,140],"blog":[157],"class_list":["post-100207","blog","type-blog","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","tag-anxiety","tag-basic-goodness","tag-everyday-life","tag-self-confidence","tag-self-esteem","tag-support-for-meditation","blogs-meditation-in-everyday-life"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nHow to Improve Self-Esteem - Tergar Meditation Community Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"We need self-esteem. At least, that's what we're told. However we deal with dark clouds of self-loathing. 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